Saturday, January 8, 2011

Life Must Go On

Something to inspire us...
See a sort of inexplicable enthusiasm, firm confidence and indomitable tenacity in his face! Marvelous! For people who make themselves in distress because of futile, frivolous and trivial reasons, let's see him and learn myriad lessons from him!

Miracle Man Walks Again Monday, July 9, 2007
He survived against all the odds; now Peng Shu Lin has astounded doctors by learning to walk again.
When his body was cut in two by a lorry in 1995, it was little short of a medical miracle that he lived. It took a team of more than 20 doctors to save his life. Skin was grafted from his head to seal his torso? But the legless Mr Peng was left only 78cm (2ft 6in) tall.

What Is LOVE?


Man vs Woman At ATM Machine

A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:


Please note that this Bank is installing new drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.
After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE Procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender.

MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine..
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.

Real GCSE Answers

Academic standards are certainly dropping. The students are good clowns anyway. I hope you enjoy this, answers by the youth of today. The following questions were set in last year's (2007?) GCSE examination in Swindon, Wiltshire.
These are genuine answers (from 16 year olds)

Q. Name the four seasons
A. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar

Q. Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink
A. Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Stay Joyful With Me

We all need to read this one over and over until it becomes part of who we are!

HOW TO STAY JOYFUL

1. Try everything twice. On Madams tombstone (of Whelan's and Madam) she said she wanted this epitaph:
Tried everything twice...loved it both times!

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down. (keep this in mind if you are one of those grouches)

3. Keep learning: Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain get idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.' And the devil's name is Alzheimer's!

4. Enjoy the simple things.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Reasons To Like A Woman


I Am Gossip

An interesting thought ....

My name is Gossip.
I have no respect for justice.


I break hearts and ruin lives.
I am cunning, malicious and gather strength with age.
The more I am quoted, the more I am believed.
I flourish at every level of society.



Parents Are Precious!

(This was narrated by an IAF pilot at a seminar on Human Relations)

My parents left for our native place on Thursday and we went to the airport to see them off. In fact, my father had never traveled by air before, so I just took this opportunity to make him experience the same. In spite of being asked to book tickets by train, I got them tickets on Jet Airways.

If Nobody Smiled

If nobody smiled and nobody cared
And nobody helped us along.
If every moment looked after itself and
Good things always went to the strong;

If nobody cared just a little about you
And nobody cared about me,
And we stood alone, in the battle of life,
What a sad old world this would be.

Laws Of Ultimate Reality

Law of Mechanical Repair
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.

Law of Gravity
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

Law of Probability
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

Graffiti To End All Graffitis

A graffiti to end all graffiti?
Drawings that can lead you to jail?
Wonder where this is, but it's really a good idea....
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