Sunday, November 10, 2013

The 10 Dumbest Things The Internet Is Obsessed With

10. Bacon
Bacon and eggs for breakfast? Please! Bacon cheeseburgers? Sign me up! But bacon bras? Bacon salt? Bacon blogs? We get it, you like bacon. Now take it down a notch. America is still super fat, right? Just checking. 

9. Betty White
She is a talented comic actress. She was funny on Mary Tyler Moore and Golden Girls. It was great when she talked dirty in that alligator movie. But where's the love for the rest of the talented comic actors in their twilight years? Ed Asner, anyone?

8. Nip Slips
We know that private moments in the lives of celebrities are appealing. But "nip slips," aka photographs taken by paparazzi of an actress's nipple, exposed for a moment as she adjusts her bikini top at the beach or poses on a red carpet, is a little creepy. Are you having a hard time finding pictures of women intentionally showing their breasts on the internet?

7. Tumblr Blogs
One idea, usually in pictures, over and over and over again. There have been some fun ones, like "Look at this ******* hipster" or "Garfield without Garfield," but most of these one-hit wonder blogs burn hot and fast and then disappear.

6. Cute Animals
Here's a sign that there is an overload of cute animals on the web. One website featuring nothing but cute animals is actually called "Cute Overload."

5. The Palin Family
From Levi and Bristol to Trip, Track, Trig to hubby Todd the snowmobile specialist, the internet can't seem to get enough of Sarah Palin's clan. A Presidential run seems like a possibility in 2012, so we won't be able to ignore her then. But for now, it would be nice. Just for a little while? Please?

4. Classic Video Games
It is fun being nostalgic for what video games used to be like. But when you're pushing 50 and start posting pictures of yourself dressed as Link from "Legend of Zelda," there's a problem.

3. Star Wars
When the original Star Wars was released in 1977, it was great. Of course, Casablanca is a great movie too, but there aren't 17 YouTube videos coming out every day featuring Lego re-enactments of Bogie and Bergman falling in love in Paris. It's time to move on from Star Wars, internet. Search your feelings, you know this to be true.

2. Cats
Worse than cute animals are cute felines. LOL Cats. The keyboard cat. Maru leaping into boxes. It has to stop. Cats do five things: sleep, run, swat, leap into things and climb. How many websites do we need for that?

1. Cupcakes
It's three bites of cake! Calm the eff down.

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