Saturday, June 2, 2012

30 Dumbest Universities In America

From crazy classes to foolish faculty to disgusting dorm rooms, these colleges show us that sometimes, institutions of higher learning could use a little more common sense.

University of Pittsburgh
Being ranked #1 is normally a good thing for a college athletic program right? Not in the case of the 2010 Pitt Panthers football team, who after a staggering 22 players found themselves on the wrong side of the law, scored top (dis)honors in a Sports Illustrated article naming the teams with the worst criminal element.

University of Mississippi
When the University of Mississippi decided to retire it's mascot "Colonel Reb" as an antiquated and possibly racist link to the old south, several alternate mascots were pitched, including the totally awesome suggestion of the squid-like General of the Rebel Alliance from 'Return of the Jedi,' Admiral Ackbar. Alas, the choice was criticized, and Ackbar's boosters couldn't repel firepower of that magnitude. The school picked some stupid bear instead.

New York University
If you want to play Guitar Hero, you can pay 400 dollars for a videogame system, the game itself, and a special guitar controller. Or, you can pay 40 grand a year to go to New York University! NYU is currently offering a class entitled "Guitar Heroes (and Heroines): Music, Video Games and the Nature of Human Cognition." We remember when video games only cost a quarter.

Harvard University
Harvard may have a distinguished list of graduates, but for every Jack Lemmon, John F. Kennedy or Conan O'Brien, there's an awful lot of a-holes. Less distinguished alums include the Unabomber, Louisiana Senator/diaper fetishist David Vitter, and the infamous Winklevoss twins, who achieved national prominence as the sore losers from the film "The Social Network."

Furman University
If you want a crowd at your college's basketball games what's the best way to do that? OK, other than doing the hard work and spending enough money to put a fantastic team on the floor? How about giving out free food? That's exactly what Furman University did in 2010, insuring that if their fans left hungry, it would only be for a championship. Bribery!

University of Iowa
Last February, no one would have batted an eye if the University of Iowa had banned it's student-run campus movie theater from scheduling a showing of "Disco Dolls In Hot Skin" a 3D, X-rated, pornographic film. But the local ABC News crew reported that the university allowed the controversial film to be shown, ensuring that for at least one night, there was be something exciting to do in Iowa. If only the porno were sexy, instead of... dumb.

Brown University
Colleges, particularly Ivy League schools, are allowed to hire anyone they want as professors. But when the AP reported that Brown University would be welcoming rapper and original member of The Fugees Wyclef Jean into their Africana studies department, some scratched their heads. Was Brown interested in what he had to say, or did they just want to rub elbows with a pop star?

Harding University
It was dumb enough when a student at Harding University complained to their college bookstore after seeing coffee mugs and picture frames for sale with the logo of Susan G. Komen. The student claimed that the breast cancer charity provides money for abortions, which it does not. But as KATV Arkansas reported, facts didn't get in the way of the school removing the items from its bookstore's shelves. Sorry, women with breast cancer, at Harding University, the stupid wheel gets the grease.

Northwestern University
Did you ever see that Monty Python sketch where John Cleese, playing a sex ed professor, has sex with his wife in front of a class of private school kids? That was funny, but when a professor at Northwestern University did something very similar, staging a live sex show that featured a woman pleasuring herself with a sex toy in a classroom, nobody was laughing. According to AOL news, an outcry on campus forced him to apologize, something we suspect he has to do after most sex acts he engages in.

University of New Hampshire
Many institutions of higher learning quite properly offer courses about human sexuality, focusing on everything from biology to cultural and psychological impact. But only the University of New Hampshire seems to have its own "Sex Fair." Thanks to a story on, we learned the event featured numerous informational booths, along with a display of sex toys and ropes. Thankfully no one mentioned seeing signs reading "you must be this big for this ride."

University of Maryland
It is usually nice to see college students get organized and motivated to create a club or team that their college didn't previously offer. But when students at the University of Maryland lobbied the school to create their own competitive eating team, many wondered how they got such a stupid idea in their heads. Maybe it was something they ate.

St John's University
Cecilia Chang, the former Dean of St. John's University, was fired in June of 2010 under a storm of allegations that she embezzled over a million dollars in donations to the college. But as though that situation wasn't dumb enough, the FBI also charged that she had threatened several foreign exchange students, who told the New York Post they feared losing their scholarships if they didn't do domestic chores for Chang, like cooking, cleaning, driving and laundry.

Georgetown University
Many American college students learn about hallucination in college by experimenting with illegal drugs like LSD, Acid or Mushrooms. Of course, if you go to Georgetown University, you can learn about these things in class, specifically "Philosophy 194: Hallucinating." Course materials include watching the films 'The Matrix' and 'Existenz' as well as "some more philosophy stuff." Yes, that's a direct quote.

Emory University
Setting a World Record would be a great way for a college to get some publicity. But if your college isn't a Mexican culinary institute, attempting to create the world's 'longest line of tacos' the way Emory University did last February seems more than a little stupid.

University of Wisconsin
In 1941, University of Wisconsin senior Lyle Knudson was forced to skip his last two finals to report for duty in the Navy in World War II. While it's wonderful that the college eventually awarded him his business degree, it's a little lame that they waited until 2010 to do it. Knudson was 94 years old when he finally got the degree. Maybe he'll use it to start his own business!

University of Georgia
College is a great place for parties, largely because significant achievements in academics, the arts or athletics richly deserve to be celebrated. But if you go to the University of Georgia, who was ranked as the #1 school JUST for partying, maybe you should focus a little less on the partying and a little more on the reason for it.

University of Virgina
Beer pong is sort of stupid on it's own, but if there were a way that someone could make it even dumber, it's students at the University of Virgina, who had a bunch of party pictures leak to the gossip website Gawker, featuring a series of what I'm sure they claim are their totally classy and not-at-all-racist confederate flag ping-pong tables.

Columbia University
A debate has been raging at Columbia about whether to re-instate an ROTC program on a campus that has banned military activity for 42 years. While debate is healthy, we can all agree that one thing isn't: booing an injured US Serviceman, something that the New York Post reported happened at a heated rally earlier this year.

JFK University
After a lawsuit by a female professor fired from JFK University for appearing in a burlesque show alleged that a male professor was not punished after disrobing in a theater performance, she exposed something no one expected: a double standard.

George Washington University
When the GWU campus paper reported that a professor was ejected from one of the team's basketball games for screaming at a referee, it was certainly dumb behavior. But here's what made his ejection even dumber: the fact that it happened shortly after a second half ceremony to honor him.

Erie Community College
The New York Times reported that the current Prime Minister of Somalia was once a professor of Erie Community College in Buffalo. I don't know what's going wrong in that school, but there's definitely a problem when you can't retain faculty members who are asked "Would you like to keep teaching here, or try to fix Somalia?"

Texas A&M Commerce
The Texas A&M Commerce Alumni Association made the local KLTV news report by announcing that they wanted the actress Lindsay Lohan to return one of their shirts they saw her wearing, saying her bad reputation may make the school look bad. Actually, alumni who are obsessed with what Lindsay Lohan is wearing makes the school look bad.

University of Illinois (Urbana-Champaign)
College dorms don't have to be fancy. But they have to be functional. That's why the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign makes this list for being voted #1 on's list of worst dorm rooms in the country. I heard the doorknobs are so terrible, you can't even hang a sock on them.

University of California (Berkeley)
College costs in this day and age can easily run in the neighborhood of 50 grand a year. So why is UC Berkeley giving away their courses for free on iTunes? Oh well, their loss is our gain; I'm going to go take a free intro to economics course, right after this game of Angry Birds.

Glenn Beck University
Glen Beck University makes this list because despite it's name, and it's fancy looking crest, it is not a real university. It is little more than a trumped up YouTube channel that allows you to watch conservative lectures if you chip in a few bucks to join the TV commentator's website. That's more of a scam than most real universities.

University of Utah
Senior journalism majors at the University of Utah almost didn't graduate thanks to a prank they pulled in the student paper where the first letters of their final columns were enlarged, spelling out terms for male and female genitalia. Normally I'd side with the pranksters on something like this, but these are journalism students. Shouldn't they have more respect for a newspaper? Even sadder for them, I read about this story on the internet.

University of Albany
The University of Albany makes the list thanks to a series of photos that were published by local police that showed a number of students engaging in rioting after a St. Patrick's Day "Kegs and Eggs" event. Sounds like too much of the former.

Ohio University
We understand why Ohio University tried to ban Netflix streaming on campus- they knew that a lot of students used the service, and wanted them to concentrate on their finals. Unfortunately, the school's efforts inadvertently ended up causing campus wide internet outages. Oops. It's like they tried to ordered an airstrike on the local video store, and took out the library instead.

Cambridge College
There is nothing quite like the thrill of being a high school senior and receiving the "thick envelope," informing you that you have been accepted to the school of your choice. Of course, Cambridge College—with it's 100 PERCENT ACCEPTANCE RATE has nothing but thick envelopes. Maybe they should just mail you a degree.

Rutgers University
Rutgers announced their controversial decision to allow co-ed roommates in dorms, reportedly to make the campus more welcoming for gays. But as the New Jersey Monthly brings up, is allowing gay students to room with members of the opposite sex welcoming to gays, or to people who are uncomfortable rooming with a gay person?

Source :

No comments:

Post a Comment

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...